Tuesday, June 14, 2011

God Blesses Me Too Much I Fear

I have been incredibly anxious of late. Especially at work. I have no pride in saying that I grow restless over the fact that I feel as though I have the ability to be at least a reasonably good attorney NOW, and a very good attorney with some practical experience. I think that while I am ready for law school to begin, I almost see it as an unnecessary step, even if it is a required step. So like I said, I have been discontented of late. But, as per usual, God sees my problem, and without fail, will send me solutions. I can name three off the top of my head. First, I went to visit my good friends Pam and Noel when Lauren spent the night with them and Kathy and I picked her up. Pam and Noel were our neighbors when we first moved in at our house, but have since moved away. Pam had also started back to school the same time I did, and her and I journeyed through the hell that it was, often time trading war stories or helping each other out. Pam has graduated and become certified as an RN. She and I were talking and she is absolutely still amazed at the amount of money she makes now, especially when she works unscheduled days! I needed to see that to keep me focused on the fact that the financial struggles that Kathy and I suffer right now are not to be the case for much longer. Between us, we make about 30 thousand a year, but out of law school, fresh faced and unproven, I stand to make 45 thousand a year! I mean seriously, if Kathy were to just pick up a job part time and bring in 10 thousand a year, we would be pretty much set compared to now. And like I said, I do believe I will be successful as an attorney and likely command a bigger income in fairly short order.

Second, with our immediate financial situation, we have been having to make some lifestyle and habit changes with regard to how our money is spent. It does my heart good to see Kathy and I, rather than making great proclamations of what we were going to do and then continuing on with our poor spending habits, actually making those decisions and sticking with them. For example, I waffled the other night and suggested we go to Goody's for some yogurt. We have dug our heels in on hour spending is going to go for the next two weeks, and that wasn't in the budget. She plainly said to me, nope, we said no outside spending on the plan and that is outside spending. So once again, my wife keeps me straight.

Third, even though I have not even started my first day of law school, I have received a job offer! The attorneys for the old law firm I worked for asked me to meet them for lunch, and point blank said they wanted first shot at me after law school, and even went so far as to say that they are looking for someone to turn the keys to the firm over too, as they are both looking for some way out but don't want to close the doors on the firm they have worked to build. I promised them I would come talk to them first, and I will. I just worry that the fact that I was an underling paralegal will not tarnish their view of me once I am an attorney and lessen their respect for my opinion. But even still, like I said, God knows I need forward movement and he provided it to me with that experience.

God, thank you so much for blessing me more than I deserve and I pray that you continue to bless me and my little family and help us get through the difficult financial and emotional times that are sure to lie ahead in the next three years. and that you help me take care of my family like they deserve and bless them mightily with patience for me while I am in law school. Thank you so much for leading us to Mt. Olive Church and giving us a spiritual home and family that have already been such a blessing in such a short time. In Your Name, Amen.

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